Thank you to everyone who submitted an essay. Here are the 2026 winners featured in The 2027 Old Farmer’s Almanac.
My Most Embarrassing Moment—That Still Makes Me Laugh
First Prize: $300
In 1973, I was a newlywed whose husband really enjoyed a turkey dinner. Wanting to be a good wife, I bought a turkey and all the necessary fixings.
When it came time to prepare the turkey, I called my mom for advice. We chatted for a while, and then she began giving me instructions. First, she told me to wash the turkey and remove the bag inside the cavity that held the gizzards, neck, and other parts. I tried to shake it out, but Mom said that wouldn’t work. I would have to put my hand inside the cavity and pull it out.
I panicked and told her there was no way I was putting my hand in-side that bird. Mom insisted, and I protested again.
Finally, in a firm voice, she said, “Donna, suck it up and do it!”
Very calmly, I replied, “Mom, this is Charlene.”
That’s when we both realized I had been talking to a complete stranger. We laughed uncontrollably, and she told me to call my real mom. I still think about this every Thanksgiving. Caller ID would have been very helpful that day!
–Charlene Naser, Gibsonia, Pennsylvania
Second Prize: $200
I was in charge of an adult Girl Scout leader training encampment. Most of the leaders had arrived by 5 p.m. and were chatting in the main cabin, waiting for the program to start. It had been a dark, rainy day. I walked outdoors to check on the weather, and, off in the distance in the woods, I saw a bright, low orange glow—a fire! I got the two field executives to come out with me and look at it, and they agreed that we should call the fire department at once. The fire appeared to be near the only road into camp. They arrived very quickly; the chief said he hadn’t seen it from the road, but he could see the orange glow (getting bigger now) and sent two of his firefighters, in full turnout gear, to find out just how far away it was.
We waited anxiously, and very soon they returned, hats off and laughing. We had called the fire department to come and put out a sunset, peeking out through low rain clouds.
It really was a fire. It was just a lot farther away than I thought.
–Mary Pobedinsky, Monroe, New York
Third Prize: $100
I was only 24, fresh out of university, already holding a prestigious job, and fully aware of all these advantages.
On that sunny summer evening, I put on a long dress, got my hair done, bought a big, beautiful bouquet of flowers, and—for reasons I still don’t understand—took a shuttle instead of a taxi. I was invited to a birthday celebration at a fancy restaurant.
Puffed-up, I ordered the driver to drop me off a block early—right at the busiest intersection in the city, across from the medical university. After I closed the door, I felt a tug at my dress—the hem of my dress had gotten caught in the shuttle door.
Within a split second, I imagined myself standing there without a dress—and knew that was not an option.
I dashed across the entire inter-section, alongside the shuttle, past other cars, in high heels and a long dress, clutching the huge bouquet in my hands. I was the first to open the door when the shuttle finally stopped.
I can still see the driver’s face—and I am forever grateful that cell phones weren’t very popular at the time.
–Lilit Hakobyan, Glendale, California
Honorable Mention
When my husband, father, and I went to Italy for vacation over Christmas and the New Year, we were all happy to show off our newly acquired language skills, speaking Italian whenever we could. Mostly, Italians were very polite and didn’t correct our language faux pas. But, after yelling out “Happy New Year!” at midnight in Italian a few times and getting some strange looks, one kind person took me aside to let me know that “Buon anno!” needs both n’s in anno clearly pronounced.
Apparently, “Buon ano!,” which was what we were joyously yelling, means “nice arse”!
–Lesley Dyson, West Wardsboro, Vermont
Enter our 2027 Old Farmer’s Almanac Essay Contest.
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