Strangest Toothache Remedies from the Old Farmer’s Almanac

While we strongly recommend modern dental care, here are some unusual toothache “remedies” recorded in The Best of The Old Farmer’s Almanac. Read them for curiosity—and maybe a laugh—but definitely don’t try them at home.

Bizarre Folk Cures for Tooth Pain

• Eat grasshopper eggs.
• Place fresh cow manure on the side of the face where the ache occurs.
• Hold a live frog against the aching cheek.
• Apply a crushed ladybug to the aching tooth.
• Never wash on a Tuesday.

Old-Time Remedies That Sound Too Weird to Believe

• Take the tooth of a murdered man or, better still, an executed criminal and apply it to the aching tooth in a graveyard at midnight under a full Moon.
• On Good Friday, comb your hair and collect the hair that falls out. Burn it and inhale the fumes.
• Pick your teeth with the nail of the middle toe of an owl.

Odd Historical Treatments for Toothaches

• Eat the eyes of a vulture.
• Bite off the head of a live mouse, put it in a bag, and suspend it from your neck. The ribbon or thread must not have a knot in it.
• Press the finger of a corpse against the aching tooth.
• If all else fails, an ancient Chinese physician recommended a pill of arsenic, which the patient should “put close to aching tooth, then sleep. Cure certain.” And final.